Ry’s Gold-School Internet Blog Vol. 2: Baked in a Buttery Flaky Crust.

Hello again, your boy Ry here bringing you Internet Gems from the past. This one is one of my all time favorites. Partly because I tend to over-analyze the “characters” in this video until I feel like I’m sitting across the table, enjoying the buttery flakey crust of a delicious Dysart’s Diner Pot Pie along side my companions. In most great videos you have some kind of conflict, whether it be internal or amongst a peer/foe. In this situation you have two very old people. People who presumably have never been on camera, and are very much out of their element when shooting this low-budget local diner T.V. commercial. I’d like to think that maybe they’re friends of the owners, or regulars of the diner. Either way the production crew didn’t realize what they were getting into. Here we have the all time battle between aloof, gone with the wind husband, and calculated, paranoid, “the world is ending if these people don’t like me” wife. A not so odd couple when you consider that this is basically the relationship between any man and woman who have been together their whole lives, and are now in the twilight where every mundane thing seems to be a matter of life and death, based on the fact that life just really isn’t that exciting anymore. To anyone who has already seen this video, I suggest that you fixate your attention on the psycho-paranoid rosy-cheeked wife. Even tho the man is who you’ll remember, the woman is someone you’ll never forget. Everyone else just sit back and enjoy. I’ll be following up after the video. Roll the footage:

I told you it was gold. Lots to break down here. In my opinion the “I can’t breath goddamn that’s funny” moment was when the wife said “baked in a buttery crispy flake”. She messed up so bad I myself felt the most redemption I ever have in my life. I hate this woman, but I also love her. She’s electric city. Let’s start breaking down the video highlights from beginning to end.

1. The moment the wife felt like her dream of being on T.V. might never become a reality.

You see she wants this more than anything. She cares about being on this low budget commercial that 407 people are going to see more than her relationship with her husband. She’s scared. She wants to succeed but all the insecurities and doubts that she’s undoubtedly had with her significant other are all materializing at once in a dream-shattering fashion. Her blood is boiling. This is also the moment she starts mouthing the words and subsequently ruining the take either way:

*she could also be casting a spell on her husband.

Let’s continue.

2. She’s starting to snap!

Thinking about divorcing this man

3. Finally, The GODDAMN REDEMPTION:

Not so easy is it!? Dummy!

That pretty much does it for the breakdown of one of my favorite videos of all time. Thank you for joining me on this journey! See ya next time.